Class Note 1989
Issue
May-June 2026
Class Note 1989. I’m coming at you again with some lighthearted banter extracted from our classmates using this Q&A format for the column. I hope it serves to inspire or humor you, which is typically the goal of whatever it is I’m doing these days.
This time, the “Big Q” I posed was: What’s something you’ve stopped doing in the last few years—and why? As a bonus, I encouraged a follow-on response: What did stopping that thing make room for?
First up is Kelley Busby, who I had the pleasure of talking to on the phone for more than an hour. Her answer elicited a response I am hearing from so many contemporaries: She and her husband decided to stop drinking alcohol, saying that it resulted in a poor night’s sleep and left her feeling lousy. “I was never a heavy drinker and am aging better without it.” Like me, she is also an empty nester, giving her the chance to travel more, most recently to cover the Australian Open for World Tennis Magazine while visiting friends and family down there. She hopes to use extra time to do more book reading vs. screen scrolling, another common refrain.
Fiona Bayly hits at an issue I am sure we all feel: “One thing that I’ve ceased doing—happily—is responding immediately to texts if they are not emergencies. Even though a text is indeed a truly quick and often effortless method of communication, a rapid reply is not always required. The art of thinking, of mulling, of slowly considering a reply is sometimes much more effective and pleasant in the end. Allowing for this new habit has given me a truly more relaxed mental approach to phone-response time. These little machines in our hands can, unfortunately, compel us to instantly react—and that ceaseless state of being on ‘constant alert’ is deeply harmful to physical and mental health and basic civility.” Hard agree, Fiona.
David Foulke was quick to succinctly reply regarding firmer boundaries: “I have stopped saying ‘yes’ to social obligations, committees, and projects that I’m not genuinely interested in. This has made time for nonprofit work, helping out my parents, and physical fitness.”
Another empty nest report came from Gesine Albrecht: “I stopped doing things such as cooking cafeteria-portion dinners every night, driving my kid to school in pouring rain, and trying to provide edits to his college essays before he hit the ‘submit’ button. So, what did I start doing with all that time? Not sure, but this morning we managed to miss the compost pickup and last night when I did cook, we were out of oil—that never happened before. So, we need to re-group! I guess what I am doing with the sudden windfall of time is to think about what to do with the sudden windfall of time.”
Enjoy your summers and please write to me or Robin Byrd with classmate trip reports or other major milestones and epiphanies going on with you!
—Candace Locklear, 5829 Colton Blvd., Oakland, CA 94611; (510) 292-8216; evilpip@gmail.com; Robin Byrd, P.O. Box 660563, Arcadia, CA 91066; robinwinters@msn.com
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More of 1989 Class Notes
This time, the “Big Q” I posed was: What’s something you’ve stopped doing in the last few years—and why? As a bonus, I encouraged a follow-on response: What did stopping that thing make room for?
First up is Kelley Busby, who I had the pleasure of talking to on the phone for more than an hour. Her answer elicited a response I am hearing from so many contemporaries: She and her husband decided to stop drinking alcohol, saying that it resulted in a poor night’s sleep and left her feeling lousy. “I was never a heavy drinker and am aging better without it.” Like me, she is also an empty nester, giving her the chance to travel more, most recently to cover the Australian Open for World Tennis Magazine while visiting friends and family down there. She hopes to use extra time to do more book reading vs. screen scrolling, another common refrain.
Fiona Bayly hits at an issue I am sure we all feel: “One thing that I’ve ceased doing—happily—is responding immediately to texts if they are not emergencies. Even though a text is indeed a truly quick and often effortless method of communication, a rapid reply is not always required. The art of thinking, of mulling, of slowly considering a reply is sometimes much more effective and pleasant in the end. Allowing for this new habit has given me a truly more relaxed mental approach to phone-response time. These little machines in our hands can, unfortunately, compel us to instantly react—and that ceaseless state of being on ‘constant alert’ is deeply harmful to physical and mental health and basic civility.” Hard agree, Fiona.
David Foulke was quick to succinctly reply regarding firmer boundaries: “I have stopped saying ‘yes’ to social obligations, committees, and projects that I’m not genuinely interested in. This has made time for nonprofit work, helping out my parents, and physical fitness.”
Another empty nest report came from Gesine Albrecht: “I stopped doing things such as cooking cafeteria-portion dinners every night, driving my kid to school in pouring rain, and trying to provide edits to his college essays before he hit the ‘submit’ button. So, what did I start doing with all that time? Not sure, but this morning we managed to miss the compost pickup and last night when I did cook, we were out of oil—that never happened before. So, we need to re-group! I guess what I am doing with the sudden windfall of time is to think about what to do with the sudden windfall of time.”
Enjoy your summers and please write to me or Robin Byrd with classmate trip reports or other major milestones and epiphanies going on with you!
—Candace Locklear, 5829 Colton Blvd., Oakland, CA 94611; (510) 292-8216; evilpip@gmail.com; Robin Byrd, P.O. Box 660563, Arcadia, CA 91066; robinwinters@msn.com