Class Note 1984
If I timed this right, this column will find you winging your way to our 35th reunion. Reunion can be a stressful time. First of all, it’s been only 34 years since we graduated, and I personally don’t like the idea of the College attempting to speed up time. Secondly, you will be spending the next few days with people who you have not seen in many years. These people will look different than they did in 1984. In addition, they all seem to have different jobs, which makes things even more challenging. It can be overwhelming.
Have no fear, dear readers. I have come up with a way to smooth this process. I will simply use the bully pulpit of class secretary to help you through those awkward early moments of reunion. Think of this column as a primer for reunion. Simply commit it to memory, and you’ll be the hit of the weekend.
Okay, here we go. Start by walking into the reunion tent. Is someone dancing on a table? Undoubtedly, that will be Meredith Levy. Meredith may or may not have something to do with organizing the reunion. Turns out that she works at JP Morgan, where she is “global head of research compliance in the investment bank.” This is a very impressive-sounding job title. Probably made up, but it certainly sounds good. Wish I had that title, instead of “ex-caddy.” Anyway, I think that Meredith’s title is so impressive that we should all adopt it, at least for the weekend. For example, what about Kim Bailey? Kim, who will likely be dancing on a table adjacent to Meredith, currently works for Sara Lee. I’m really not sure what she does there, but let’s just say that Kim is “global head of research compliance in the pound cake division.” See, you already know two people!
Mike Salzhauer will also be at reunion. Mike is the head class agent. We will refer to him as the “global head of research compliance in the class agent division.” Mike will likely be found in the reunion tent, in close proximity to the bar, asking you to pony up some money for a construction project at the college or something.
Marty Lempres and wife Liz have recently become empty-nesters. In response, they have moved from their suburban Boston home. Marty has asked that we not reveal his current address, lest the children find out and move back in. Marty may be somewhat difficult to find at reunion, as he will likely be wearing a disguise. Anyway, Marty works for the American Red Cross, where he is the global head of research compliance in the blood donation division.
And there you have it, the beginning of a successful reunion. Just locate the aforementioned organizers, smile and ask about their job as global head of research compliance. It will work like a charm. Unless you run into Salzhauer. Then run the other way, or they’ll be naming a library after you.
—Eric Grubman, 2 Fox Den Way, Woodbridge, CT 06525; (203) 710-7933; grubman@sbcglobal.net; Juliet Aires Giglio,4915 Bentbrook Drive, Manlius, NY 13104; julietgiglio@gmail.com
